From Driving Exams:

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too shit-faced to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a shithead all day long.

List of texts and stories

  1. City Boy
  2. How To Install Software: A 12-Step Program
  3. A Day at the Bar
  4. A Divine Sign
  5. Why did the chicken cross the road?
  6. Religions
  7. How Do You Translate That?
  8. One liners
  9. Have you ever wondered?
  10. Creative Answering Machine Messages
  11. The Biggest Lies of All
  12. Bumper Sticker
  13. Real Church Announcements
  14. In the Courtroom
  15. From Driving Exams
  16. Fun in elevator
  17. From Students' Exams
  18. Kids - questions and answers
  19. Murphy's Military Laws
  20. Newspaper Headlines
  21. How to Pass Your Exams
  22. How to Order Pizza by Phone
  23. Programmer Bulb Jokes
  24. Real Advertisements
  25. Fun With Your Roommate
  26. The World's Thinnest Books